the first time I met mr tulip's parents
They're lovely, funny, affectionate, wise, kind, generous people. No-one could wish for better in-laws-to-be. They're amazing and I love them.

However, the first time I ever met them, Mr tulip hadn't told them he was bringing me home for the weekend. The crafty so-and-so told them he was bringing his friend. They assumed I was going to be mr tulip's big, strapping, rugby-loving, pie-eating, willy-owning best friend. And when I arrived, and was none of those things, mr tulip's father blurted out "Oh, we thought Scott was coming! Thank god he isn't! You're much more attractive!"

But if that wasn't embarrassing enough, once we'd had dinner and several bottles of wine, and I'd relaxed a bit and managed to do all the lovely nice helpful polite well-brought-up things that parents love you for, and managed not to do any of the filthy dirty depraved things their sons love you for, they showed me a videotape of a documentary about naked ramblers.

Worse than that, they knew the naked ramblers.

Worse than that, the naked ramblers were, erm, past their prime, and a bit saggy.

Worse than that, they all thought it was hilarious.

It's been five years and I've only just uncurled my toes.

Oh, sure, now it's funny...
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Mon 1 Dec 2008, 22:10, 4 replies)

Over dinner one night
with Mr Kitty's parents, my FIL, who is also my boss declared

"Doesn't misskitty have great tits?"

I didn't know what to do. I still had to turn up to work the next day and look at him.

oh well...
(misskitty reeks of sex and turpentine; laudanum afternoons, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 3:33, closed)

Could have been worse
If they had been the naked ramblers.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 10:39, closed)

Could have been worse
They could have been your parents...
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 11:30, closed)

"If they had been the naked ramblers"
This is what I thought you were going to end with!
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Thu 4 Dec 2008, 2:51, closed)