Stripped emotions and a bottle of rum
I have a very beautiful friend who used to work as a stripper, however she decided that taking her clothes off in seedy clubs would not compliment her chosen career as a primary school teacher. (Although both seem to involve standing in front of a load of incoherent, dribbling humans – it’s just that the money is much better for the former).

It was a few years after she had hung up her 5 inch stilettos and started wearing sensible dresses with boots that she met an enchanting young gentleman and fell in love. She had always told him about her previous life as a stripper – the name she used, the clubs where she worked, the sugar daddy who lavished her with expensive dinners etc., but this was as far as it went.

Then one evening, about 10 months into their relationship, they staggered home from a wonderful alcohol fuelled night out. This seemed like as good a time as any to revive her stripper routine one last time, for his eyes only. Time to build it up.

"I'm Jessica. I'm a stripper, I've heard it all before, sweetheart. Tell me something I've never heard..."

“ok... I want to marry you.”

At which point she runs out of the room, crying uncontrollably and hysterically, and barricades herself in the bathroom. For the next few hours, she alternates between lying cataleptic on the tiles of the bathroom floor and making walrus noises down the big white telephone to God. In turn, he paces around the flat, repeatedly tries knocking on the door to see if she will unlock it or at least let him know she is going to be ok and wondering what to do.

It was only the following day that she remembered that what he actually said was "I'm pretty sure I might want to marry you". So not "I want to marry you". Two expressions of uncertainty in one sentence. Not a commitment phobe, oh no, not he. Though apparently that is enough to make her cry with joy.

And in other developments, he has now moved into her house, they are fostering a dog, but avoid any suggestions of marriage or stripping.
( kitsune-tsuki tankeløst hode får lettest sove, Tue 2 Dec 2008, 12:31, Reply)