I am a fair bit older than some of my friends,
and as such a tad more experienced at being drunk, horny and in posession of a phone. I'm also rather good at advice, and get asked how to deal with certain situations quite often.

I usually help. Usually.

When one of my friends got really drunk at a party last year, he got talking to his ex. Presently, she left, leaving him drooling on my shoulder about how much he wanted to shag her. I was pretty sick of this after a few minutes, he gets FAARRR more ladies than I ever do, and I pretty much hate the old regrettable drunk monkey-sex that everyone else seems to love, so evil me emerged and decided to 'help'.

I suggested he send her a beautifully worded romantic text. Seeing as he was so drunk, I composed it myself, dictating it to him as he drooled over his phone. Short. Warm. Endearing.

"U, me, sex?'

Astoundingly, she rejected this heartfelt offer with a cold 'not a chance' Chuckling, I consoled him with a cheery "haha well try this... 'OK then, U, Alan, sex'" (Alan, of course, being my good self). He scowled at me. I was impressed at my cleverness.

Impressed, that is, until I realised he HAD sent the second message.

She didn't reply. I can't imagine why.
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Wed 3 Dec 2008, 3:02, 2 replies)

Because
being pissed, he sent "U, Anal, sex"? Or am I stating the obvious?
(Rsoles, Wed 3 Dec 2008, 10:43, closed)

I hope so.
I really do. :P
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Wed 3 Dec 2008, 17:40, closed)