I applied for a job as a hospital porter...
...and one of first questions they asked me at interview was 'would seeing corpses bother you?'

I said no - and got the job.

I started shortly afterwards, and on my first day the head porter led me to the porter's room, and introduced me to the lads. The phone then rang, the head porter took the call - then turned to me and said 'lets break you in gently - we have a body to get from intensive care'.

So off we went, with our trolley - we arrived at the ward - I stepped behind the curtains, looked at the body....

...and promptly acted like Chunk in Goonies, when the body falls from the fridge.

I....i....it's a STTIFFFF!!
I totally locked up, and just stood gaping like a goldfish - expecting it to sit up and shout 'bbrraaainssss'.

Anyway, once I'd chilled a little, I took it off to the mortuary - where I saw loads more corpses - and ever since then they don't bother me.

In fact I collect them....under my patio, in my attic, and in my fridge.

Thanks for listening...
( gunkyfibbon ...acting his shoe size, not his age, since, Thu 28 Feb 2008, 17:10, Reply)