I joined a dating site
and worked on a profile. I had a flattering, recent picture of myself (without any exes in the photo), a witty opening line, and an honest and compelling paragraph about my interests and hopes (written in actual words and not txtspk). I ruined it all by forgetting the obvious first step. That's right, I forgot to include a picture of my erect penis.

I was so embarrassed when I worked out why no one was contacting me!
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sun 26 Sep 2010, 15:34, 4 replies)

You don't need to do that if you have a moderately normal looking penis - only people with freaky looking knobs have to display them proudly.
(Freakmandu, Sun 26 Sep 2010, 16:55, closed)

you seem to know a little too much about this...

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 27 Sep 2010, 10:06, closed)

I met my wife on MySpace
after trying lots of different dating sites i simply did a 'postcode search' for girls in my area and sent her a message saying this, and only this.

"you have nice eyebrows"

i realise this is not really a reply to your post but i feel quite smug and need to share my one tip from online dating: do something different, don't just send a long list of "i see that you like massive drugs, i like massive drugs also... i see that you don't like using the shift button, neither do i... you love dogs? i've seen some dogs recently, they were running... i like your red jumper, i have a red jumper..." just ask what the thing in the background of one of the photos is, i once got laid by asking a girl why the plug sockets (not a euphemism) in her house were so high up. or comment on something that people don't always comment on (see the eyebrows line above).
(Ross McBingobangobongo bingobangobongo, Mon 27 Sep 2010, 14:12, closed)

ive got a good story about one

met a women for the first time yesterday and we talked for like 5 hours
i found her on a dating website (tho it was a special one for large people as im a bit porky so i though ide have a better chance on one like that) now i just need to find out if she wants to satisfy my need for kitten play (google it)
(imgunnabesick rawr ^ \_/ ^, Mon 27 Sep 2010, 19:59, closed)