you know that old visual gag with hitting a hammer on a springy surface and it smacking back up into the face?
Done that.
Told people I walked into a door - I'd rather have them suspect spousal abuse than sheer cocking stupidity of hammering something together but missing on a sprung floor.
(niceandwarmandhot vive la résistance, Sun 6 Apr 2008, 1:26, 3 replies)

ahhaahahahhaah
brilliant.

And the walking into a door thing? I once had a black eye from genuinely walking into a door, and a buggered knee from falling downstairs. The number of times people gave me a pitying look and told me there were places where I could get help and that I didn't have to live like this. No, I'm not being abused, I'm just a clumsy fuckwit.
(Rakky (forgot her password) The muffin maverick, Sun 6 Apr 2008, 1:36, closed)

You two reminded me of my mother's famous black eye.
Over the weekend in question, she and my father were planting flowers in the yard. There were frequent trips in and out of the house via the *glass* patio door. One trip in, mother left the door open. While she was in the house, dad cleans the door and shuts it. Mother heads back out to the yard and smacks face-first into the patio door. She ended up with a cut on her nose and a big black-eye. Worst bit was, she was previously scheduled to go into the hospital the next day for surgery.

Yup, because she was pissed that he had shut the door and embarassed to have walked into it, she told everyone who saw her bruises that my dad had hit her.
( flirting with badgers What? It sounded good at the time., Sun 6 Apr 2008, 8:09, closed)

As a small child
I once was listening at the keyhole of a door, my mother opened the door and the door knob hit me square in the eye. I went to school and told the teacher my mother had done it. She had.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 9:27, closed)