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This is a question Down on the Farm

Have you ever been chased from a field by a shotgun-wielding maniac? Ever removed city arseholes from your field whilst innocently carrying a shotgun? Tell us your farm stories.

(, Thu 24 May 2012, 13:19)
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Swan.
While not quite farm related, but continuing on the theme of animal slaughter, I was about 5, sitting in the back seat of the Humber Super Snipe.

Mum was driving the family (4 Older siblings + dog) to our annual beach holiday. We were barrelling along a causeway, when a particularly dim black swan ambled across our path and was subsequently mown down by 2 tonnes of fine British engineering.

Mum stopped the car, inspected the swan, ascertained it was dead (and still warm) and popped it in the boot.

There was a deathly silence in the car. My older sister asked "what are you going to do with the swan".

"Probably mash and gravy" says Mum.



edit: If the Queens finds out, we'll offer her a bucket of KFC in compensation.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 15:46, 1 reply)
Treason!
Dead swans are the property of the Queen. Your mother should be banged up in the Tower.

But it's OK, because I did that to her last night.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 19:50, closed)
5 kids
She has been banged up enough already
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 22:34, closed)
Well, at least it's 5 times more than you'll ever get.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 22:52, closed)
Well can you let her out please?
It's her feeding time.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 22:50, closed)

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