Pancake day
I was once in a nightclub and had, as usual, lost my cloakroom ticket. I didn't realise this till I had got to the front of the queue - was pretty drunk and just wanted to get home to bed by then. The nasty chavvy Croydon girl in charge of the cloakroom refused to give me back my coat and little rucksack I had left there unless I could describe them - in detail.

Managed to persuade her to hand over my coat but apparently she had lots of little rucksacks and was more reluctant to let one of them go - so I had to describe what was in it. If I'd had just all the usual crap that so many of you have kindly shared with us (keys, phone, wallet) then I'd have been in trouble - she had told me on no uncertain terms that I would have to wait until the end of the night (not a fun prospect, remember i was in a "nite" club in Croydon).

Luckily for me I had been at my boyfriend's place and had collected the stuff I'd left there on pancake day - my lickle pancake frying pan and a whisk. Ta-da! You should have seen her ratty little chav face when she saw I wasn't winding her up.
(Mad McMad, Fri 28 Oct 2005, 10:37, Reply)