Duct tape shenanigans
I am new, but have lurked for ages. Here is my story:

A few years back I was working adjacent to a sewage treatment plant (we were building new settlement & storm tanks etc...) I worked with two other surveyors, one of whom was a complete pisshead.

One morning, pisshead comes into the office late and extremely hungover. He placed his elbows on his desk and held his cheeks in his hands, closing his eyes and seeminly trying to forget that his head was nipping like ruddy fuck.

The other surveyor noticed this, and, thoroughly pissed off at pisshead being a pisshead again, decided to play a little prank on him.

He took the roll of duct tape he had out of his drawer, and pulled out a length of tape. Holding the roll in one hand and the end of the tape with the other, he approached pisshead from behind, who was still cradling his head in his hands.

You can see where this is going.

Quick as a flash, he looped the tape over his face and wildly wrapped it around and around and around his head. He was too quick for pisshead, who, dispite resisting and trying to stand was overpowered, and now had his hands taped to the side of his face, and his eyes and mouth taped shut too.

He was proper pissed off, and jumped up from his chair flailing his elbows about like a mong, his nostrils flaring, knocking shit over, while we fell about laughing at the daft bastard. He managed to get it off in the end, but not without ripping out a lot of hair.

He saw the funny side and responded by drawing a massive swastika on the back of the other guys hi-viz jacket, and filling the hood with coloured chalk powder before rolling it back up again. Next time it rained he looked like that woman in 'Private Benjamin' that got fucked over by Goldie Hawn in the shower.

Length? Thinking about Goldie Hawn in the shower has improved it somewhat.
(Spaff_Quaffer Wise fwom your gwave., Tue 18 Dec 2007, 11:16, Reply)