My "ultimate chat up line"
A few years ago, sat with mates, I decided we all needed bad chat up lines. In hindsight I was the only single one, but it could be a laugh to come up with some goodies.

My crowning glory was to tell a woman I was "The Stig" from top gear. How we laughed at the idea of me saying that to a woman, surly I'd never have the nerve.

That night I got far to drunk, and tried it. It failed but was funny. Months later I decide to give it another go, my friend Heidi says she knows just the person who'd love it. She darts off and I await the sure fire hottie to woo with my lies.

Moments later, she returns, with some one in tow, but not what I expected. A very tall Greek gentleman. WTF? She knew i was straight, yet she drops in an unmistakable male friend for me to chat up. I was shocked, didn't know what to do. "Tell him! Tell him!" squeals Heidi, like an excited cupid.

What could I do? I panicked, and said the line. He probably doesn’t know top gear, he's Greek. Wrong. He knows it, he LOVES it. I spend far to long faking it, before enough time has passed I can make my excuse and go.

Apology for length? Despite Heidi's best efforts, he didn't require one.
(Mong goose, Thu 10 Jul 2008, 16:35, Reply)