Exposed
A year and a half ago, I started dating the most wonderful girl on Earth. Except I'm a big wuss with regard to talking about this sort of thing, so I never told my terribly posh and easily disapproving parents how we came to meet (it involved much, much alcohol and circumstances that might have made my father smile and congratulate me behind mother's back, but would certainly have launched a thousand ships and a million disapproving words from my mother), and once we've been going, I really couldn't face the increasing wave of reproach. Living half a continent away, this isn't too hard to engineer, even if one is close to one's parents. So we've had an awesome time, while my dear parents were in significant ignorance about me going out with the Girl.

Until I was stupid enough to land myself in hospital with a medical emergency (this sort of shite happens to me way too often!).

At which point, as soon as I was in a state to, I had to call my parents. Which, as conversations go, was rather fun.

- So now you're on your own, son?
- No.
- Care to elaborate? - all pity and compassion vanished from my mother's voice at the instant.
- Umm...
- Out with it!
- Well, I'm here with my girlfriend.

Boing. about a minute of mute silence on the other end of the phone; cue me assuming a twisted grin and wondering whether I'll be beheaded, impaled (more or less a family tradition) or merely disinherited and would have to make my living playing the flute at the corner of St Paul's. Much to my pleasure, my parents decided it's not wise to traumatise me so soon after being ill by a tirade of shouts and a long moralistic lesson about loyalty and truthfulness, probably mostly in classical Greek and long drawn-out quotations from Plutarch and Cato the Elder. So the conversation ended on a cool but not overtly hostile note, and that as of itself was a battle won.

Deciding to fess up at this point was probably the right choice. The Girl got away having saved the day in their eyes, my parents being fully cognisant that I'm a loser and couldn't tie my shoes unless given express guidance, and my little untruthfulness was never brought up again.

Conclusion: it's not a sin if you don't get bollocked for it.
(adelie discovered the joys of a board sig on, Sun 13 Jul 2008, 13:03, Reply)