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This is a question Family codes and rituals

Freddy Woo writes, "as a child we used to have a 'whoever cuts doesn't choose the slice' rule with cake. It worked brilliantly, but it's left me completely anal about dividing up food - my wife just takes the piss as I ritually compare all the slice sizes."

What codes and rituals does your family have?

(, Thu 20 Nov 2008, 18:05)
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Stick with it!
Well done for lasting six days.

I'm a non-smoker myself, so don't have any personal experience - but since you asked for hints and tips, I will share with you something that I read from Allen Carr's best-selling book - which I believe to be absolutely 100% true, since I also thought about it independently.

Smokers believe that they enjoy smoking. However, this is all a big con - because what they don't realise is that it's all relative. Let me give you an analogy.

Imagine a very stiff, uncomfortable pair of shoes which pinch your feet. Now imagine the feeling of relief you get when you take them off, and soak your feet in a foot spa. Feels lovely, right?

Now imagine a passtime in which people deliberately chose to walk around all day in uncomfortable shoes - purely in order to feel the pleasure of taking them off at the end of the day.

That's exactly what smoking is. You see, the feeling of "relief and relaxation" created by the nicotine hit is only temporary. In fact, what's happening is that the nicotine is creating MORE tension and discomfort, which will be felt in the future. The only cure for this is more nicotine.

The most important thing to realise is, that the feeling of relief and relaxation you get is merely how non-smokers feel all the time anyway. It's just that because you were previously tense due to nicotine withdrawal, the difference feels like a positive.

Silly to walk around in uncomfortable shoes all day: much better to wear confortable trainers all the time anyway. OK, so you won't experience the "relief" feeling - but similarly, your feet will never hurt in the first place.

Therefore the best way to combat the withdrawal symptoms you feel is twofold:

1) Understand and realise the truth of the above
2) Don't consider it as "giving up" smoking. Giving up implies that there was previously something good, which has now been forefeited. Instead, consider it as the transition from being someone who's dependent on a poisonous and addictive drug - into a person who feels perfectly okay without the drug. You're not "giving up" tobacco: you're getting your independence back.

Anyway - however you choose to succeed, I wish you the best of luck! You're doing the right thing.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2008, 21:44, 1 reply)
Alan Carr for the win.
Smoked while I read it, finished my last while reading the very last paragraph and never touched another cigarette. Never went through the pangs. Easy compared to cold turkey.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2008, 23:34, closed)

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