b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Family codes and rituals » Post 313005 | Search
This is a question Family codes and rituals

Freddy Woo writes, "as a child we used to have a 'whoever cuts doesn't choose the slice' rule with cake. It worked brilliantly, but it's left me completely anal about dividing up food - my wife just takes the piss as I ritually compare all the slice sizes."

What codes and rituals does your family have?

(, Thu 20 Nov 2008, 18:05)
Pages: Latest, 17, 16, 15, 14, 13, ... 1

« Go Back

Broken. Twisted. Hopefully soon forgotten.
So many stories of family traditions that should warm the heart. So many stories of quirks that are endearing to those related to them. So many stories of functional families.

I was thinking the other day to see if I could find any memories of family things when I was still living in England. And you know what? I can't. All the memories I can easily remember are related to various geekeries (old Acorn and C64, or Laputa).

Looking back to the time when my family still all lived in the same house in England, I can't remember any so-called traditions. I don't remember what we did at Christmas and other similar events in the year, I don't have any memories of any events in the household.

Up until Christmas 2003 or 2004, the whole family would descend on my Grandparent's house for the big day. We'd open all our presents and have a sort of "normal" day eating too much and the younger people being banished to the front room with toys whilst the adults had the middle room.

2005 and 2006 were when the cracks started appearing. It was just immediate family at the house (granparents, one cousin, my uncle, my mum, an "aunt" and me). If that doesn't sound like just immediate family to you, I already know that godsdammit! If you were to look at the family tree, it would look more like a mangrove thicket. Kinda. That's just the Discworld nut in me coming through.

Ahem. Anyway, moving swiftly on...

Last year, at about this time, things started to come to a head. All the effedupness and tensions which I knew absolutely NOTHING about, gods bless my Mum for that, exploded shortly after New Year. The family unit in my grandparents' house dissolved and I didn't know why.

After my Gran moved out she decided, in her infinite wisdom, to tell me some of the detail. Damned if I know why. I still wish I didn't know.

My uncle told me some more. I wish he hadn't.

I thought a lot about the situation with my parent's divorce and my Mum leaving the family unit as soon as she got the chance after reaching Scotland. That frightens me. I didn't want to think about that.

I thought about my other aunts leaving as soon as they got the chance. I know why now, and dammit I wish I didn't.

If anyone on here knows me (doubtful I know), don't let on. Please. I didn't ask to know about this. I didn't want to know about this. And everything I remember, and granted that's not much, from my childhood and the more recent past is tainted FOREVER.

And yes, I know there are some stories seriously more effed up than what I've just told. And I've been light on the detail on purpose.
(, Wed 26 Nov 2008, 23:07, Reply)

« Go Back

Pages: Latest, 17, 16, 15, 14, 13, ... 1