Festivals
Mud, rubbish sex, food poisoning and the Quo replacing the headline act you've mortgaged your house to see. Tell us your experiences
Question from Chart Cat
( , Thu 4 Jun 2009, 13:33)
Mud, rubbish sex, food poisoning and the Quo replacing the headline act you've mortgaged your house to see. Tell us your experiences
Question from Chart Cat
( , Thu 4 Jun 2009, 13:33)
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Bestival 2008
As I am sure many of you are aware going to the toilet at a festival in the middle of the night can be an ardous journey, mainly involving tripping over guy ropes.
To solve this problem my friend Matt had come up with a genius solution - a funnel, a pipe and an empty plastic bottle. He was very proud of himself.
First night we all got very drunk, as you do, and then all retired to bed. Matt actively looking forward to putting his peeing device into action.
At what must have been around 4am - I was awoken by screams from Matt's Girlfriend - she seemed very angry. I went back to sleep.
The next morning we all awoke to find Matt looking very sheepish.
Matt then explained what had happened. He had woken up still quite drunk and wanting a piss, he was very excited about his peeing device so placed his penis in the funnel and then urinated - copiusly.
It was only when his girlfriend started screaming did it slowly dawn on him what was happening, but by then it was far too late.
Matt had forgotten to put the other end of the plastic tube in the bottle creating what was essentially a urine hose pipe within the confines of a tent.
Scarmbling to try and get the open end of the pipe into the bottkle only made thigs worse as he directed the stream of pisss in every single direction but the right one. He soaked his girlfriend, both their sleeping bags and all their clothes with his piss before he finished.
He was not popular and their tent smelled vaguely of piss for the rest of the festival.
(The next day a man ran into our tent at full speed and fell on me in the middle of the night - it almost gave me a heart attack and detroyed the tent - not happy)
( , Fri 5 Jun 2009, 18:42, 2 replies)
As I am sure many of you are aware going to the toilet at a festival in the middle of the night can be an ardous journey, mainly involving tripping over guy ropes.
To solve this problem my friend Matt had come up with a genius solution - a funnel, a pipe and an empty plastic bottle. He was very proud of himself.
First night we all got very drunk, as you do, and then all retired to bed. Matt actively looking forward to putting his peeing device into action.
At what must have been around 4am - I was awoken by screams from Matt's Girlfriend - she seemed very angry. I went back to sleep.
The next morning we all awoke to find Matt looking very sheepish.
Matt then explained what had happened. He had woken up still quite drunk and wanting a piss, he was very excited about his peeing device so placed his penis in the funnel and then urinated - copiusly.
It was only when his girlfriend started screaming did it slowly dawn on him what was happening, but by then it was far too late.
Matt had forgotten to put the other end of the plastic tube in the bottle creating what was essentially a urine hose pipe within the confines of a tent.
Scarmbling to try and get the open end of the pipe into the bottkle only made thigs worse as he directed the stream of pisss in every single direction but the right one. He soaked his girlfriend, both their sleeping bags and all their clothes with his piss before he finished.
He was not popular and their tent smelled vaguely of piss for the rest of the festival.
(The next day a man ran into our tent at full speed and fell on me in the middle of the night - it almost gave me a heart attack and detroyed the tent - not happy)
( , Fri 5 Jun 2009, 18:42, 2 replies)
Now that....
....gave me teh serious officelols.
:) Clickments for you!
( , Tue 9 Jun 2009, 13:31, closed)
....gave me teh serious officelols.
:) Clickments for you!
( , Tue 9 Jun 2009, 13:31, closed)
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