Lick boxing
I've done various martial arts on and off since the age of four and was as chuffed as nuts to get my black belt in Chinese kick boxing in December. As you can imagine, it involves a fair bit of the ol' fighting.

At one of our classes I was fighting big Tom. So named because he is called Tom and towers above everyone. It was about half way into the class, and Tom executes a push kick. These are more of a push than a kick, normally done at chest or stomach height to push your opponent back to give you some room to follow up with something. It's a straight kick, but involves you thrusting your hip into it at the end to generate the force to push someone back.

Tom, managed to plant his push kick right in my face. The hip thrust and push tends to drag the foot down when this is done. The sole of his foot slid down my face, dragging down my lower lip down and making it run the full length of his foot.

We'd been training for half an hour in bare feet at this point on a carpet that has 15 years of sweat, vomit and child piss soaked into it. There are some things mints just can't take the taste away from.
( Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Thu 14 Mar 2013, 15:40, 8 replies)

I've clicked
on the I lick this button.
(username failed moderation, Thu 14 Mar 2013, 16:27, closed)

Oh christ, I know the exact taste/smell you mean.
I haven't done any martial arts in years and I still feel unpleasant thinking about it.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Thu 14 Mar 2013, 17:07, closed)

"martial arts"
hahaaaaahahahaaaaaa
(King Zog of Albania lives in Kensington, Thu 14 Mar 2013, 17:09, closed)

Um, yes.
Martial arts.
( Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Thu 14 Mar 2013, 21:17, closed)

This made me chuckle!

( da5id <YOUR SIG HERE>, Thu 14 Mar 2013, 19:38, closed)

Congratulations on your grading.
I can well imagine the crusty foot (we train on tiled floors with just as much grid and shit on them).

When I was (much) younger my instructor demonstrated a side kick to the head (on me) and just mis-judged the range, embedding large chunks of grid in my forehead. I'd hate to think of that collecting in my bottom lip.
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Fri 15 Mar 2013, 6:55, closed)

Thanks :)
Hardest thing I've ever done... 5 hours of intensely anaerobic activity, only 3 water breaks, and it ended with 4x 3 minute rounds of full contact kickboxing.

I've never been so thirsty in my life. I just about managed to walk to the pub afterwards before everything started to cramp up. Spent 2 days afterwards lying on the sofa in my dressing gown (with blackbelt on) covered in tiger balm.
( Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Fri 15 Mar 2013, 10:27, closed)

I find that after every lesson.
Too knackered to walk to the car. An old lady could probably take the whole class on, we wouldn't even try to resist.

Good to know that some gradings are still keeping up standards. A friend last year was saying how good her nephew was - he'd got his black belt in karate and was only 8! Talk about devaluing achievements.
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Fri 15 Mar 2013, 11:42, closed)