I'll just repost this. Because I'm LOVELY.
nameless let rip with an earthshaking splatterfart bellowing his challenge like a bull elephant seal.
Gonzo looked up from examining the droplets of baby oil glistening on his chest hairs and responded with a resounding splatterfart of his own, his Pringles tin acting like an echo chamber. The soundwave caused some of the lime jelly to spill out of the paddling pool.
Nameless began to oil himself up in preparation for the fight to come. He'd been rehearsing this fight in his mind, and what was left of his intestines for weeks now, loading himself up with spicy curries washed down with fizzy pop. He was sure that Pringles tin or no Pringles tin, Gonzo would end this day defeated.
Gonzo waited patiently. To him this was just another challenge, and he had never lost one yet. Still in his prime, he wasn't about to relinquish his hold on the remote with the Hollyoaks Omnibus about to start in ten minutes. The Chinese Food was already ordered and he had his pick from his b3ta harem to hold hands with, all he needed to do was send nameless packing with his carrier bag between his legs in shame.
To Be Continued
PART 2
Recap in FILM TRAILER VOICE: CHALLENGED BY NAMELESS FOR THE RIGHTS TO WOO THE B3TA HAREM, GONZO MUST ENTER THE FIGHT OF HIS LIFE! WHO WILL SURVIVE AND WHAT WILL BE LEFT OF THEM? FIND OUT IN PART 2!

Gonzy knew what was coming, the telltale fluttering of nameless' carrier bag letting him know what was about to occur in the same way that a gunslinger could read his opponent's intentions from the muscles around their eyes.With a roar nameless charged.
Gonzo started to neatly sidestep, only to slip in the jelly and fall out of the paddling pool. However nameless was moving too fast to adjust and charged the empty space where Gonzo had been a heartbeat earlier. Momentum carried him straight across the jelly filled pool and straight into the garden wall, stunning him.
Meanwhile Gonzo had managed to get back up and now it was his turn to charge. He hurled himself at the staggering nameless' back.

Please insert your credit card details for a further five minutes.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 19 Mar 2013, 3:33, 2 replies)

LOVELY
LONELY
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Tue 19 Mar 2013, 10:21, closed)

Still not going to fuck your wife for you, you know.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 19 Mar 2013, 19:24, closed)