My old bass teacher told me this one...
He had a student that had just bought a 2nd hand bass, quite an expensive one. The teacher imediately noticed something strange as the particlular make (that I can't remember) was well know for their beautiful pearl inlays on the fret board while this one was plain and dark. The teacher asked to have a closer look at the guitar and when holding it in his hands made a comment about the lack of inlay while gently scratching the fretboard only to discover, to his horror, that there was a peral inlay, hidden by a layer of grime composed of dirt, skin cells, sweat and possibly blood and blister puss (yes playing guitar can be disgusting).
( Crap Little Monkey Deathstar, so good they built it twice, Wed 8 Feb 2012, 13:55, 7 replies)

My guitar has blood on it
it seems wrong to wash it off
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 8 Feb 2012, 14:25, closed)

My drums had blood on them.
I don't think one can claim to play an instrument until one has such.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 8 Feb 2012, 14:57, closed)

Don't get me wrong
it's not mine
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 8 Feb 2012, 15:02, closed)

The last time I bought guitar secondhand
I used wheel acid and wd40 on the fretboard to remove the gunk of the previous owner.
( Mr.Pickle Is not big or clever.., Wed 8 Feb 2012, 15:03, closed)

Bass teacher????

You needed a teacher to teach you how to play bass??

There's one born every minute I suppose

*despairs*
(King Nightmare, Wed 8 Feb 2012, 16:21, closed)

Hahahaha
and now I can't stop thinking of Token in South Park
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 8 Feb 2012, 16:35, closed)

Well he did teach me:
Mode scales and their use
Sight reading
How to play 6-7 notes a second
How many drugs you can take at a gig and still perform coherently (lots just avoid downers and lsd, I really really really mean it about the lsd)
( Crap Little Monkey Deathstar, so good they built it twice, Wed 8 Feb 2012, 17:45, closed)