Um...
I have nowt.

Again.

All of the people in my life are generally pleasant and do not deserve such things, nor would I stoop to such levels.

However, I have a vaguely related notion for a convivial mockery opportunity. My significant other does a lovely line in chocolate-coated marzipan-wrapped cherries. I think a plate of these at a party would be nice, though plan to replace one of the cherries with a delicious brussels sprout. Russian roulette for the everyday fellow.
(ThomsonsPier consumes, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 15:58, 3 replies)

my great nan
when my grandad was a 20-something had a massive predilection for sausage rolls.

as he always picked the biggest, she hatched a plan. She swapped the sausage for lettuce and waited. yes, he bit in and was proper dissapointed - as this was back in the 1950's to have complained about his mom-in-law would have been tantamount to blasphemy.
( bazza van der trance , ooh baby baby, baby baby. Get up on this., Thu 18 Sep 2008, 16:51, closed)

That kind of treatment goes beyond mere japery
To subject a man to that kind of disappointment where sausage rolls are concerned is unforgiveable.
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 19:17, closed)

Sprouts
Did that once, as my young and foolish mind decided it would make a splendid April Fool's day prank.

Unfortunately for the congregation at my church, April 1st fell on a Sunday that year. Luckily for me, most of them saw the funny side.
(Photon wasting your time since, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 2:15, closed)