Piss-drinking
Myself and a mate were playing darts in the local and there were 2 lasses at the bar, one the worse for wear. She was being *particularly* abusive to myself and stealing and drinking our drinks.

This went on for half an hour until I had enough. I found a half pint glass in the bar, headed for the toilet and proceeded to drain the snake into it. It was early doors, so my new cocktail had quite a yellow tinge to it - at this stage I was trying to decide what beverage this would pass for. I then headed to the bar, and asked for a glass of ice, as the warmth of fresh urine might have given the game away.

Walked back to the dartboard and concealed said glass to allow contents to "cool". Poor me though, as the drink had been spotted by said lass and she already had her eyes on it. She beat me to it (I was on a double 5, I was trying to concentrate) and my intial thoughts were, "Oh no, I'm fucked, it's still warm".

Anyway, she downed it all (no mixer), gave me the fingers, and fucked off back to the bar no questions asked.

Moral of the story is, never fall out with your girlfried in public. She's now my wife of 8 years.
(ISignedUpToTalkShit but that was another QOTW, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 16:36, Reply)