5 years ago, my dad and three of his friends had a "pre-wake wake"
... based on the fact that someone always says "He would have loved it if he'd been here", so they thought they would be, and if anyone dies during the proceedings, then they've saved at least a quarter of the costs.

The morning of the party, I was sitting at breakfast with him, my sister and her three children.

Dad opened the morning's chatter: "I went to my doctor this week to have my cholestrol checked. He said at my rate I've got about a 15% chance of dying of a heart attack. 'Well!' I thought - 'I'm pretty sure that's how I'd like to go - urk! Dead before I've hit the floor', and then I thought to myself '15%?! That's far too low!'" and helped himself to some more cream in his coffee and butter on his bread.

At this Easter weekend, he invited us all to comment on any particular items of his we'd like him to label to reserve, to reduce any squabbling or anything being accidentally thrown out when he he finally goes.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 11 Apr 2013, 15:30, Reply)