Milky milky
"I bet you any money you couldn't drink that bottle of milk," said Seany to his rival in stupidity, Ju-Vid.

The bottle in question was in our old school kitchens, which had been locked up and forgotten as the new ones opened on the other side of the playground.

In the rush to move to the new facilities, a pint of milk had been left on the side, where, clearly visible from the window, it had turned over the weeks from white to yellow to green to brown.

"50p."

"DONE."

Hands were shaken. The bet was ON.

All Ju-Vid had to do was break into the old kitchens, swipe the bottle, bring it outside and neck it in one.

The breaking-and-entering was no problem for Ju – he knew all the nooks and crannies around the school, and had once turned a French lesson to French farce by taunting Madame Talbot with the words "Pompt de pompt de pompt" from an air-con grating just above her head.

He was in and out within seconds, clutching his prize to his chest.

"Now – down in one."

The lid came off the bottle, and as the rancid smell escaped, he suddenly didn't feel up to it. But a bet was a bet and 50p was 50p.

He held his nose, and poured it down, the last lumps disappearing with a final, shuddering swallow.

"50p, you bastards. Each. The lot of ya."

We reached into our pockets to give him his prize, but Ju was not in much of a position to collect.

The position he was in was bent double, making strange bubbling noises, before:

"YAAAAAAAAAAARCH!"

A stream of chunder that would have put Mr Creosote to shame.

"YAAAAAAAAAAARCH!"

Evil-smelling spew that covered not only himself, but we poor spectators, and anyone in a ten foot radius.

"YAAAAAAAAAAARCH!" and: "I've shit meself"

Rules are rules. He lost that bet.
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 7 May 2009, 15:06, Reply)