System of a down(s)
A few years ago I realised something. If I could come up with a gambling system that could increase your initial stake by at least 5% over the duration of a year, I would have an investment scheme better than any savings account. It all seemed so simple. If I could turn £100 into £105 within 12 months I would quite literally be onto a winner. Compound interest would make me a millionaire.

I thought it would be easy to come up with such a system, what with being an accountant and a science graduate and edumaKated. I reasoned that people lost money through gambling because they were greedy and stupid and didn’t have the cognitive capacity to treat gambling like a long-term investment.

To cut a very long story short, I chose to base my system on football (soccer) results, just how hard could it be to predict the result when there are only 3 possible outcomes? (Win, lose or draw). It took me 2 years to come up with a system based on league position, games won and goals scored. The equation even factored in whether the past results were home or away matches. There was just one problem. It was shit.

It didn’t work. Plain and simple. I tested it out for a year with very small bets. Instead of my pot steadily increasing over time it steadily decreased. I was gutted, my dreams of easy wealth evaporated overnight. I had made the mistake of telling 3 friends what I was working on and they were even more excited about the system than I was. That’s 3 times I had to crush unrealistic hopes and dreams that I had created.

I would love to be able to end this with some witty quip that encompasses redemption and humour, but I can’t think of anything. I was arrogant enough to think I could beat the bookies and all I did was set myself and 3 friends up for a fall.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 7 May 2009, 16:36, 2 replies)

Well....
....Arbitrage betting is the only system that can work, but you have to put sooo much time and money in it first.

Best to spunk it up the wall on cheap whiskey and dirty porn I find.
(NoveltyCondomHead Clanks Wams., Thu 7 May 2009, 16:56, closed)

I Agree

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 7 May 2009, 17:00, closed)