Guilty SecretsWe were shocked - nay, disgusted - to read on an internet discussion forum of a chap's confession that his darkest, guiltiest secret was that he recently cracked one out over press photos of tragic MILF Kate McCann. He reasoned that "she's a good Catholic girl and looks dirty, so she'd probably go bareback".
What guilty secrets can you no longer keep to yourself?
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Fri 31 Aug 2007, 12:22)
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I used to live......Out in the sticks, and my Friday and Saturday nights out were preceded by a 2.5 mile walk and followed by a 2.5 mile stagger back home, along a country track. One time - proper fucking high on E and a bit drunk - I really needed a dump; so I quickened my pace. I got back to our driveway at home, and got my keys out, but it was no good - it had to happen RIGHT NOW or it was in my jeans. I squatted on our gravel driveway and let my bowels go. Quite possibly in full view of the whole street, but hopefully all of my neighbours were in bed!
Faced with the dilemma of a huge wet dump to dispose of at 4 in the morning, I had no idea what to do. Couldn't wash it away with the hosepipe - might wake my parents up and i'd be rumbled! So i sloped off to bed. I arose the next afternoon for my dinner, greeted by this from my mum: "We must've had a deer or something in the garden last night, fucking huge pile of shit in the drive"
I spent the rest of the day pissing myself laughing and nobody twigged. Still makes me laugh to this day.
(, Sun 2 Sep 2007, 22:40, Reply)
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