hmmm.....
where to start...

As a child we had a school banking scheme - you know, take your bankbook to school once a week with 20 cents in it and they collect them up, bank the money for you and give it back the next day. Encourage the young'uns to save, and all that. One week I spent the money instead. Told Mum I'd lost the bankbook on the bus to school... kept it in the wardrobe for weeks until I mustered the courage to take it out, stuff it down my pants, ride my bike to the rubbish dump out the back of the farm and bury it under a dead cow...

Roll forward to school. Wandering out from under the balcony having just bhad a ciggie, and was surprised by the headmaster. Him: "what are you doing out here?"
Me: "Feeling a it sick Sir" (and it wasn't a lie, as I could feel my testicles retracting into my body at the thought of being caned for being caught smoking....)

At University I slept with my best friend's girlfriend, and she (drawn to my animal magnetism and the ability to lick my own nose...) starting going out with me. The bastard got the last laugh as I found them in bed together six months later.

Still, the icing on the cake: I left my wife of nineteen years for a lady I met on the internet. Actually, that's not quite the truth. We lived on opposite sides of the world, and I hadn't met her at that stage. So I left my wife for someone I'd never met. And I could never tell my (ex)wife why I left her....

The only slightly redeeming feature is that we'll be married soon (having met and decided that it was the best thing I've ever done).
(alnhelzz, Mon 3 Sep 2007, 11:22, Reply)