A recent one...

While discussing the details of an upcoming gig, a friend; let's call her S, opined that it would be amusing if she were to write a song about our singer (G), to sing at the end of the gig.

"Hilarious" I said, "No chuffing way" I thought (not sure why, but I seem to be quite polite in my head).

Being an affable type I played along and contented myself that we'd never have time to fit the song in.

The set list was agreed among the band and I was pleased to insist that we squeezed as many songs as possible into the half hour we had allotted to us.

With a couple of days to the gig our singer was having a chat with S and was asked to pass on the message: "Tell Gunther that the song's coming on really well. He'll know what I'm talking about".

"Fucksocks" I thought, for this was no time for politeness, not even in my head. "How to manage this without looking like a twat in front of the band, they're never going to go along with this. We haven't even practised for fucks sakes."

Right, quick text to S: "G tells me the song's coming along well... hope we have time for it!" in my head the text was awash with sarcasm, but sarcasm is difficult to convey in text form, so I added more: "There's every chance we won't have time, but there will be more gigs..."

That should do. She won't be disappointed and I won't look like a muppet. Or would I?

A text arrived immediately on my phone: "Hi Gunther. You didn't think I was serious did you? I was only joking, I'm not getting up in front of a crowd of people and singing, no fucking way!"

Ahem.

The gig was last Thursday and I think my bout of stupidity is going to outlive the memory of what was actually a really good performance.
( Moey, Fri 22 Aug 2008, 11:06, Reply)