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This is a question I'm going to Hell...

...because I said the Lord's Prayer backwards at a funeral to summon up the Goat of Mendes, Freddie Woo tells us. Tell us why you're doomed.

Thanks to Kaol for the suggestion

(, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 13:09)
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After a night of DJing
I'd stayed with a friend in London, and I was making my way back home, through a busy Liverpool Street Station.

So, there I was, standing in the bustling station, a filthy hangover in my head, a warm bottle of water in my hand, and a large metal box of CDs on my back.

Squinting up at the departures board, I managed to find the train I was looking.
As "Platform 14" slowly processed through my vodka-slowed membranes, I felt a *thump* on my back.

I slowly turned around, and saw a small boy on the floor, crying.
After a few seconds of powerful mental detective-work, I figured out that the kid had run, full-pelt into the corner of the metal DJ case on my back.

This deductive genius was confirmed by the trickle of blood running down his head, and his crying.

I'm ashamed to say that I was laughing so hard that I had to run to the toilets to be sick.
(, Tue 16 Dec 2008, 11:44, 6 replies)
I like this. I am sure if the burlesque mother was near it would have all been your fault.
(, Tue 16 Dec 2008, 11:55, closed)
What would the burlesque mother have done about it?
Danced around him, scantily clad with a feather boa?
(, Wed 17 Dec 2008, 13:48, closed)
This ain't hellworthy
For two very important reasons.

1. The kid should have been looking where he was going.

2. The parents should have kept better control of their waste of DNA hellspawn.

So, whilst funny, not your fault, if that's worth anything...
(, Tue 16 Dec 2008, 12:08, closed)
I know...
I could've checked he was ok, but I was laughing to hard.
Which triggered hung-over bile-rising.
I'm sure we've all been there...
(, Tue 16 Dec 2008, 12:10, closed)
Well this is true
Although the bile-rise usually only happens when I'm stuck in a smoke-filled room with a stinking hangover. Ironic for a smoker, really.
(, Tue 16 Dec 2008, 13:06, closed)
I like

*sharpens corners of metal boxes*
(, Tue 16 Dec 2008, 13:51, closed)

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