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...because I said the Lord's Prayer backwards at a funeral to summon up the Goat of Mendes, Freddie Woo tells us. Tell us why you're doomed.
Thanks to Kaol for the suggestion
( , Thu 11 Dec 2008, 13:09)
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As much of a cunt as it makes me feel, I nearly piss myself laughing every time I see one.
I was at a party once, in a flat with a balcony.
I'd gone out to have a smoke, and when I turned around there was a midget in the lounge.
I laughed so hard that I had to stay out on the balcony for about an hour.
I wish I could be more tactful sometimes.
( , Thu 18 Dec 2008, 15:14, 17 replies)
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When my boss handed us our wage cheques (yes, cheques, I work in the 19th century), our technician said he was going to blow his on curry and DVDs.
for some reason this made me squeak "Ha! that's nothing! I'm going to blow mine on midgets and cheap vodka!"
I am now looking for a new job. And a therapist.
I would just like to reassure everyone that my theatre job is intact. Unlike my sanity. thank you.
( , Thu 18 Dec 2008, 15:18, closed)
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I'd blow mine on a large under-ground carpark, midgets, a pack of feral dogs and lots of cameras :D
( , Thu 18 Dec 2008, 15:20, closed)
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But I have the common
Fortunately, I don't see them out and about much...but I do tend to stare straight in front when I walk and so might not notice them...
( , Thu 18 Dec 2008, 15:20, closed)
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And saw what I (genuinely!) thought was a small child walking across the dance floor.
I grabbed all my mates and pointed, in the fashion of 'what the fuck's a child doing in this den of drugs and general iniquity?'
Needless to say, he turned round and caught about 5 people staring at him and pointing. And yes, he was a midget, and was old enough to be in the club.
*shame*
( , Thu 18 Dec 2008, 15:20, closed)
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Who wanted to be a glamour model. I showed Boss Keloid the article and he told me that he knows a midget man who fucked her. Apparently her vagina looked like a plucked turkey.
( , Thu 18 Dec 2008, 15:28, closed)
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Make a lot of money with one like that. Unplucked I mean.
( , Thu 18 Dec 2008, 15:38, closed)
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oh, it's you, Lusty!
*twizzles turkey twizzler at lusty*
( , Thu 18 Dec 2008, 16:12, closed)
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You've just reminded me, I dropped a dwarf a few years ago...
( , Thu 18 Dec 2008, 15:59, closed)
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on a stag weekend a few years back, and in one of the 'gentlemen's establishments' which we visited, one of the 'dancers' was a midget.
Apparently she got quite a lot of business. Not from any of us, I hasten to add.
( , Thu 18 Dec 2008, 16:09, closed)
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