Back in the day....
...I used to live with my mate, lets call him Paul, because everyone else does.

In no particular order he...

*ripped the banister from the wall while trying to climb down it.

*nuked the microwave somehow, and took the electricity supply for the house with it. He repaired the damage with tin-foil and sellotape.

*he drove his mums car into/through my fence

*he fell out of my bathroom window, bounced off the porch roof, landed on the grass and then went in and drank a beer, like nothing had happened.

*he set fire to himself, and things, on numerous occasions.

....but then you have his finest moment. We threw a party, people came, everyone loved it, the beer went down a treat, and then, in the case of Paul, came up a treat. All over my sofa.

He hoovered it up and turned the cushion over.

For the next 12 months I was baffled as to why the hoover smelled like it did. It still makes me gag to this day.

He was my best man though, so he must have some redeeming features.
( The Pollitt chooses to listen to Enya on, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 16:28, Reply)