The most eventful house in the world
I used to share a great student house with more or less every drop-out or reject from the local community when I was at Uni. It wasn't even my house. I was just one of the people who used it incessantly as a place to score weed, get drunk before a night out or whatever. Luckliy my girlfriend at the time lived there so it was OK. The place was rented by a bunch of heavy-partying art students who rarely allowed a weekend to slip by without having all their punk mates over for a cider session.

The place was ace, but after a year or so it just started getting surreal, for example; the kid who lived in the house opposite got dragged out by the police after killing his girlfriend and stuffing her in a freezer. One day a crowd of German punks turned up at the door (led by the intimidating but incredibly friendly tattoo-headed Sven) and stayed for about six months sleeping on the floor. At some point the neighbour got fed up with the noise and put a hosepipe through an open window when we were out and flooded someones bedroom.

Another day we were chilling in the garden, mocking the police helicopter buzzing overhead, then before we knew it police dogs, meat wagons, the whole lot surrounded us, the chopper hovering over the garden and shouty burly coppers telling us not to run. Nothing was further from our minds as we were worried they'd search the house more than anything else. Luckily it was just a case of mistaken identity, but all very odd.

One morning we woke up to go to a student fees protest in London, and found an unconcious random Italian girl on the sofa. no one knew where she came from. And there were dozens of bunches of flowers all along the garden wall. Our friend Roo said someone had died on the street in the night. We were well freaked out but went on our way nonetheless. Only a week or so later did he confess that whilst pilled up the night before he'd robbed a Spar of their flowers and put them along the wall!

There are too many other tales of that house to tell here. Needless to say it was more of a fucking education than four years at Uni!
(Amputated is tickling the exit wound, Sat 28 Feb 2009, 17:58, Reply)