i've been pretty lucky really
mostly only ever lived with friends.

however, when i was in a houseshare in west london, we let a girl named jess move in with us. jess was normal and quite pretty (although if she was half as pretty as she thought she was, she'd have been very pretty indeed) but very very spoiled. she had this boyfriend whom she called jamesy and she would cry if, for instance, a vw golf appeared on tv - "oh, look, it's a jamesy car." and she would ring him and talk over the top of "friends", asking what he was having for "din-dins". i once heard her ask him if he wanted "to go wee-wee" before they got in the car.

anyway, a couple of months after she moved in, jamesy went on a round the world tour/fled from her, not sure which. i was expecting a call from my bloke so i took the phone (mine) up to my bedroom and jumped in the shower before he rang. about 2 mins later, jess barged in, straight into my bathroom, where i was covered in hot water and soap, and started screaming hysterically about me being a selfish fucking bitch.

turned out jamesy waymesy woo woo poo head was calling from america and she had missed his call because i had "stolen" the phone. i've never been yelled at by another woman whilst naked in the shower before or since.

and no, i didn't hold out the baby oil and suggest that she join me...

(although i wish i had, then i could have rammed the damn bottle up her STUPID ARSE!!!)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 8 Apr 2007, 19:10, Reply)