I love Lucie...
...because Lucie is my best friend and has consistently provided us with much dimness over the years. I remember encouraging my brother to wind her up and marvel in her trusting nature. And so this conversation was born:
Lucie: You have tortoises! That's so cool. What do they eat?
Mark: (seizing his moment) Rabbits.
Lucie: What? Really?
Mark: (encouraged) Yes - they catch them and eat them.
Lucie: I never knew they could move that fast!
I swear it happened. Mark has had hours of fun winding her up ever since.

Another of her beauties involved her taking her car to the garage. She rang the mechanic to book it in, and he said, "What sort of car have you got?" to which she replied, "Red."

Lucie is now a primary school teacher. Whatever those kids write in their Monday morning newsbooks, she will believe - brilliant.
( thealternativefact, Mon 10 Jan 2005, 14:27, Reply)