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This is a question Accidental innuendo

Freddy Woo writes, "A woman I used to work with once walked into a car workshop to get her windscreen replaced, and uttered the immortal line, "Have you seen the size of my crack?"

What innuendos have you accidentally walked into? Are you a 1970s Carry On film character?
Extra points for the inappropriateness of the context

(, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:05)
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PE teacher
There is a set up here, all true, which explaings the note...

When messing about with me sister, we decided to see how many stairs we could jump down. i regularly didn't use the bottom 4 stairs on the way down and decide that 6 steps (out of 13) was pretty decent. So did it a few times until i landed with al the skill of Les Dennis on the Games. Flat footed and really badly bruised both feet. i couldn't walk without walking on the bruises.

Come PE day, there was no way i could play rugby ( called that but really was lots of cross country running in the rain ).
At last, a legit reason for a note. Mum dutifully writes one and puts in an envelope.

I hand in the note. He moans and walks off and i set about the 1 hour 20 minutes of double PE and the skiving in the warm with applomb. About half hour in he comes over to me pissing himself laughing and asking if i was lying? I said no my feet really hurt. He then probed deeper, and enquired exactly how i did such damage to myself? i explained i jumped down the stairs, and he just said "well how the f*ck did you hurt your testicles then?"

I was confused. Really confused and started to get a bit scared. I stated again i jumped down the stairs and landed heavy.

I then thought to ask to see the note. Well done mum.

" Dear Mr Davies. Barry cannot do PE today as he has jumped down the stairs and hurt his balls and heels of his feet."

Mum 1, Grammar Fairies 0
(, Mon 16 Jun 2008, 14:28, 3 replies)
Incest, in jest...
"when messing about with me sister" - ooh-arr!
(, Mon 16 Jun 2008, 14:55, closed)
I was about to point that out..
(, Mon 16 Jun 2008, 15:45, closed)
i am surprised...
...no one mention "probed deeper"...Fnar fnar
(, Tue 17 Jun 2008, 12:08, closed)

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