Accidental innuendoFreddy Woo writes, "A woman I used to work with once walked into a car workshop to get her windscreen replaced, and uttered the immortal line, "Have you seen the size of my crack?"
What innuendos have you accidentally walked into? Are you a 1970s Carry On film character?
Extra points for the inappropriateness of the context
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chthonic, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 12:05)
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Ages agowhen all the web was still fields. I went to a school. Aside from the core curriculum of woodwork and fighting we were expected to get an hour in the week to do stuff to a windows 98 computer*.
This involved six weeks of making buisness cards in Microsoft publisher**, The teacher being a willowy type wasn't exactly down with the kids.
She was asked to stop teaching that class after a collage of our work made it to the display case. 25 odd cards all for companies like "beaver cheese farms", "fudge packing.Ltd" and "golden showers fountain supplies"
*ie state of the art.
**not part of the standard office package for 10 years now
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willenium Fist bump for verification, Tue 17 Jun 2008, 17:18,
1 reply)
Data card mishaps...You think that was old?
35 yrs ago our computer class was basically pairing up, and one person calling out a code to a second person who then hole punched a card.
At the end of the lesson the teacher collected up the cards, and they got taken to the only place in our town (and this is a town of nearly 30,000 people then) which was the council accounts system.
The program was really basic:
10: write "B3TA"
20: goto 10
So our task was to write a program to do something incredibly inane, and I got bored.
Derek, the person punching the holes, didn't notice me slipping a couple of lines in, and then removing the cards to put in someone elses pile.
The following week we all got bollocked by the tutor.
"Some stupid child" (hey up, we were about 15...) "thought it was funny to tell the machine to print "This is shit" and go back and print it again continuously. They had to turn the computer off to take the cards out."
At that point he picks up a box from the floor and pours a loooooong strip of printer paper from it to the floor.
During the 10 minutes (well, it seemed it) that it took to end he's looking around the room.
"If I find out who the stupid little idiot is, he won't be coming back into this class, and don't forget COMPUTER'S ARE OUR FUTURE"
He stormed out.
We all went to look at the sheets of paper, and many a section of it ended up on bedroom walls that night.
(, Tue 17 Jun 2008, 19:41, closed)
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