Why I was late"On the way to the station, I got hit by a bat, it almost took my head clean off. Then the machine would not accept my ticket and the guy at the gate didn't think I looked like the photo on my travel card. So I had to go home and get my passport.
Then the train was 45 minutes late to the station because of the dangerous badger threat at Carpenters Park.
When I was on the train it took and hour and a half to get past the biscuit factory because the driver was really fat.
Then there was a delay stopping at the station because the train in front had heard we were coming and decided to play a practical joke with a rubber shoe on the track.
That is why I couldn't get here on time today."
What's your best excuse?
(
chthonic, Thu 28 Jun 2007, 10:36)
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Pigeons + Japanese BossesThe number of times I've had my good suit shat on by pigeons as I leave the house is soul destroying, as well as expensive. But the time I got pigeon guano in my eye was worth a couple of days of due to swelling, watering etc. Still didn't stop me playing on my Xbox though!!
Years ago, I worked for a Japanese bank in the fair city of London. Chalk-stripe suit, the whole sexy shebang. On ONE day I arrived 20 minutes late as opposed to the HOUR early I usually arrived every day. I was called to the head of the desk (We sat in two rows of three, facing each other,with a Japanese Manager at the head of each desk)to explain why I was late.
'I'm sorry, but my train was cancelled this morning and the next one was full'
'Which train? From which station? At what time?'
'The 7.09 from xxxxx to Charing Cross'
'You may be seated'
An hour later, I was 'exonerated' as the bugger had called British Rail (Pre-Internet) to check to see if my train had indeed been cancelled!!!
What a total, shorter than average Twunt!!!
It was only made up by the fact that when I enter the Gentleman's urinal later on, I was faced withe the same twunt standing at the urinal relieving himself with his trousers AND PANTS round his ankles!!!!
Laugh??? I nearly shit a kidney!!
And then I resigned the following morning!
Bunch of mentarists!!!
(, Thu 28 Jun 2007, 14:21, Reply)
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