So we were on a minibus tour in America with twelve other strangers, including two lads from Munich, and a couple from Paris.
I'm sure you can see where this is going.

The guide was good - he learnt everyon's name immediately, where they were from, and made a wee crack at their expense as he drove, and was perfectly happy to take a crack at his, too.

Mrs V and I were at the front of the bus, so subject to a significant amount of his commentary and questions.

As we drove, he explained about the area and stuff, and somehow managed to get on to talking about railways.

"Hey, Vagabond - how d'ya like your railways in England then? Are they any good?" He asked.

"Well" I said, hearing the mechanism start to whirr, and the bomb bay doors start to open, "they're ok - I think a lot of unnecessary fuss is made over them - but I wish we had a shiny new system like France since the Germans flattened theirs."

To a collective intake of breath, and the guide saying, "If you don't mind I'd rather keep politics out of my van if it's all the same to you. So - coming up here on your left you'll see ... "

Fuck's sake - 6000 miles, 70 years, a holiday trip of a lifetime for many of us, and I manage to go and mention the fucking War.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Sat 24 Aug 2013, 15:17, 2 replies)

But Vaggy, it was the Brits and the Yanks that fucked up the French railways.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Sat 24 Aug 2013, 17:04, closed)

It's alright, you did it once but I think you got away with it.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 24 Aug 2013, 17:27, closed)