My parents constantly wound me up
While out on our usual Sunday morning walk round the lodge, we spotted a goose with its head under its wing. 'Oh look a headless duck' says my Dad. After he satisfied all my questions (How does it eat, know where it's going etc.) I proudly informed everyone that I'd seen a rare headless duck.

My Mum told me the moon was made of green cheese, and forgot about it. Until parents evening, when my teacher showed them a large and elaborate project I'd done. It was so good it had to go on the wall. It was all about the moon. Being made of green cheese.

My (Iron Maiden) fan) uncle told me he couldn't have his hair cut because it bleeds.
I pointed to a badge thingy on his new telly asking what it was. He convinced me it was a self-destruct button and everything electrical had one. I then went round every electrical item I had, locating the 'self-destruct button' to make sure I didn't press it. It was years before I accidentally pressed one and nothing happened.

One last one. My Mum sent me on my first day at school having learnt the rhyme;
Little Jack Horner
Sat in his corner
Eating Christmas pie.
He stuck in his thumb,
An pulled out a plum,
And said 'What the bloody hell's that'.
Of course when teech asked if anybody knew a nursery rhyme my hand shot up. My rhyme was carefully and proudly recited to a group of 30 four-year-olds.
I usually got ignored by the teachers at primary school when I put my hand up.
(boukha, Thu 15 Jan 2004, 12:37, Reply)