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This is a question Losing it

Bluehamster tells us: "This morning I found myself filling my mug not a teabag, but with Shreddies." Tell us of the times when you've convinced yourself that you're losing your marbles.

(, Thu 21 Jul 2011, 12:59)
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I actually scared myself once...
When visiting my girlfriend while she was away at university, I discovered just how horrendous the people who lived above her were (and definitely still are).

We'd had a nice evening in, she'd cooked, I'd done the washing up, we'd watched some film or other and camped down on the double-bed made of sofa cushions we methodically laid out every weekend. As pillow-talk gave way to longer and longer sleepy pauses, it became apparent that the people upstairs had music on. Very loud and very shit music. After banging on their door and the ceiling a few times it became increasingly obvious that they'd gone out and left this musical horseshit to boom on out of their radio in their absence. After a failed attempt to blot out the signal with silence with an FM transmitted I had in the car, we resolved to ignore it as best we could and lock the house door so they at least they wouldn't get any sleep that night either.

At about 3 am, still totally awake, we heard someone trying the front door. Then banging on the front door. Then kicking the front door. Then screaming at the front door. The commotion eventually died down and we grinned a vengeful grin together.

Then we heard a fucking loud scrabbly thud in the next room; the bathroom. Not daring to open our safely locked door, we hear thumping footsteps cross the hallway, out into the porch and the house door being opened from the inside. In our sleep-deprived minds we hadn't suspected that a malnourished hipster student who can squeeze into drain-pipe trousers can climb up a drain-pipe and maneuver their way through the tiny window over the toilet. A thought which still scares me to this day. Nevertheless, they were in.

My girlfriend, bumbling mess of hair and pyjama material that she was, scurried to the front door to politely ask the neighbours to turn the music that they left on all night down. It is now 4 am.

These cacophonous troglodytes clatterfuck their way up the stairs, each footfall a thunderous blast into our room below. I think we all know what happens next and I'm hope this helps you understand my reaction. They turned the music up.

In one poetic motion I arced from the bed to the door, into the hall, planted my feet squarely below me and yelled up from my very centre: "Shut the fuck up, you miserable cunts". Seven words it took a full 10 seconds to bellow, emphasis on the final word, and all of them in a voice I'd never heard before. I grabbed the suddenly weightless hoover and began pounding lumps of plaster out of the ceiling. I moved on to their door and painlessly hammered it with my every limb and appendage. My head was giddy, everything was starry. I felt like I was having a euphoric, angry migraine. I'd never understood the phrase "the red mist descends" but suddenly, my head was swimming in it. I turned around and stomped back into the hallway, turned my head up to yell again, when I caught sight of my girlfriend, stood in the bedroom doorway. The look on her face froze me where I stood. She was petrified. Of me.

The red mist, the madness, fell away instantly and I was suddenly aware of the ache in my back, the gravel in my throat, the sharp pangs of pain in my joints and extremities where they'd hit the door, the sweat that was pouring over my body. "Go back inside" I whispered, and then stood with my head against the corner of the hall for 20 minutes, trying to control my breathing. After 20 minutes, I realised the music had stopped and I'd been stood in silence for quite a while. I'd never completely lost the plot like that before, but it scared the hell out of my that I had. I thought then, as I still think now, that if their door had given way I would have probably seriously hurt someone. I had simply no idea what I was doing.

I didn't sleep that night.
(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 17:10, 20 replies)
The Incredible Hulk
Nice work though. I understand your frustration.
(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 17:29, closed)
Or you could have saved alot of hassle and looked less of a dick by turning the top tunes off at the fuse box

(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 17:46, closed)
ah, but there's no epic According in that.
Effective, though. I think in my second year I had the mains fuse for the upstairs flat in my bedroom more often than it actually was in their fusebox.
(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 18:13, closed)
Or replace it with a lower-rated one so that it trips out the power more easily.

(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 18:56, closed)

I was thinking this as well.
(, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:50, closed)
...quite possibly a winner. Mainly due to b3tans who are shit scared of having you as a neighbour...
(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 19:08, closed)
Calling the landlord may have been a better bet, though. That, or kicking down the door and turning the music off yourself.
(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 19:36, closed)
i know the feeling
happened to me once and only once, when my mate, a small girl of only 20, was being attacked by 5 large lads aged between 18 and 23. seeing my best friend being attacked like that made me lose it. i don't know who was more scared, them or me, but they left her alone :(
(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 19:50, closed)
Now read the question and try again.
It's not 'Honda Accords,' it's 'fucking hell I'm going senile.'
(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 20:45, closed)
I feel your pain
At least your lot turned the music off, the miserable cunt next to me is an ignorant drunk who plays bangra music at all hours dispite the police taking his sterro away last year.

I have pounded my fists raw trying to get him to shut up... but apparently I can only hear it "cus it's foriegn" and actually he "was in the Pakistan Army" so "shut the fuck up babe".... I had many non-pc responses but managed to funnel all of them into a frustrated scream and a call to old bill...

Fucker ignores them too :-(
(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 21:24, closed)
Baseball bat
works every time.
(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 21:59, closed)

(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 22:31, closed)
You should be more tolerant.

(, Tue 26 Jul 2011, 22:53, closed)
My boyfriend's mum/little brother did that last time I stopped.
LOUD and on for hours, just below me. Turns out they'd gone out shopping and forgotten about it. How nobody calls the police on them I'll never know but it's surprising how lovely and polite they seem otherwise. Not even a little chavvy.
(, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 0:44, closed)
Again (second time this week) - needs more "THIS DID NOT SIT WELL WITH ME"

(, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 8:57, closed)

(, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 11:06, closed)
We have a new super hero.

(, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 9:44, closed)
is brilliant
(, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 10:04, closed)
You should have cut them all good

(, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 11:37, closed)

Ive had a similar experience.

I have anxiety related to sleep/lack thereof.

If it is a weekday and I hear music or noise in the neighborhood I get worried I wont get any sleep.

I have on a few occasions assaulted the wall with fists, shoes, voice in a blind fit of rage (and the scared gf thing happened too).

I also phoned the police a few times, only to be told its "not a police issue" and "let the council know" or "make a complaint to the letting agency". None of which help me sleep that night, does it? Cunts.
(, Wed 27 Jul 2011, 13:53, closed)

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