DEEP HEAT...
As a young lad I had a terrible aversion to school. Having tried to fake vomiting and ingesting A massive dose of water and salt to no avail I changed my tactics to that of physical injury.

Cue me limping to my mother complaining to demonstrate the terrible strain in my ankle. Mother being as smart as mother do be asked me to fetch the deep heat. As she applied it to my ankle I hesitantly asked about side effects to which she casually replied if theres no injury your leg falls off. Thankfully I still got off school after striking my head off the bath as I fainted.
( dazbrilliantwhites has been meaning to change this..., Fri 17 Sep 2010, 16:40, Reply)