kiwanotree
The only real case I can think of where I have been misunderstood with hilarious consequences is kind of a sore point for me. I was a teenager at the time and didn't find it funny myself, but the other kids at school thought it was great.

I had been trying to grow my hair for quite some time and it was getting pretty long, but, as anyone who has tried to grow their hair will know, there is an intermediate stage where, in order to achieve length, you have to accept that it's going to get pretty big and stupid-looking.

Anyway, I decided I should go and get it thinned out a bit because, although I was pleased with the length, the girth was getting ridiculous. I sat in the chair at the hairdresser's and I told her I wanted to lose some of the volume but keep the length. I thought 'length' referred to the front and sides as well as at the back. Unfortunately for me, the hairdresser seemed to think that the word 'length' only applied to hair at the rear so she ended up cutting it at the front and sides and didn't cut it at the back. I was left with an almighty fucking mullet! That was not cool back in the mid '90s. Unless you were in Germany at the time, in which case you could have got away with almost anything.

I got some serious hassle at school the following week, and that led to me threatening a couple of people who wouldn't stop calling me names and stuff. I decided I couldn't go on like this, so instead of trying to grow the front and sides again to match the back, I just went and got it all chopped off and started afresh. I never went back to the same place to have it cut, though.

Not particularly funny or entertaining, I'm afraid. But it is true. And kind of tragic. Perhaps the trauma I suffered as a result of the episode is deep-rooted and the underlying reason why I now spout such complete and utter bollocks every week.
(stusut79, Wed 12 Oct 2005, 10:09, Reply)