Just another day for me.
After a day of dispensing justice from my Honda Accord on well hard cunts, I came across Mr. T acting like a right knob. I pulled the Honda over and told him “I pity the fool” and then using my well honed Ninja skills learned while on a 6 day tour of Japan, kicked him down and then back up several flights of stairs, which taught him a lesson let me tell you.

Of course a flock of super models had gathered to watch me dealing with T. When I was spent from dealing the kicking and T had learned his lesson well, I said to the best 10 looking super models “oi bitches, get in me Honda, but don’t be leaving no snail trails on me vinyl seats” cause I knew they was dripping from their clunges from seeing a well hard man like me dealing out the justice and then drove them back to my place.

As soon as I got home, I took MASSIVE drugs, heroin, cocaine, ecstasy, aspirin the lot and had mad sex about 20 times with each super model, which made them cum about 20 times each, cause apart from being right hard, I am also a brilliant sexer with a massive schlong which looks like a babies arm holding an apple. After I was sick of the super models I told them, “Oi bitches, get out of me house” which they did cause I am well hard and have a Honda.

I took some more massive drugs and then went out to the hardest night club in my town, bashed the bouncers, cracked the hardest drinkers in their faces, had sex with their girl friends, drank like 1000 pints of strong larger, finished off with more horrendously massive drugs that I stole from the well hard drug dealers at the club, who did nothing because they could see in my eyes I had Ninja training and was well hard, and then went home.

When I woke up the next morning I was surprised find a kitten and my mum’s bra in my bed. I don’t know where they came from but, I don’t give a fuck cause I am well hard and this story is all true.

cheers
(bad_advice QOTW survivor from the first trollocost!, Thu 3 May 2012, 3:52, 2 replies)

You are Damon Beesley and Iain Morris
aicm$5p
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Thu 3 May 2012, 8:32, closed)

Are you the woman from the Smack My Bitch Up video?

( user_names_suck, Thu 3 May 2012, 9:46, closed)