This is not my story - it was told to me by a chaplain who'd worked at a private boys school
One of the boys in the school died from meningitis and the school decided to conduct a memorial service in their old and creaky chapel.

After singing some hymns chosen by the parents, he delivered a eulogy as solemnly as he could whilst catching the eye of the devastated couple in the front row. He then called for congregation to kneel and take a few moments silence in contemplation.

He reached under the lectern for his kneeler... and rammed a huge splinter from the decaying floor straight up under a fingernail. He managed to supress the girly scream, but tears of sheer pain rolled down his face. As he started to lead the Lord's Prayer, he caught the mother's eye and her face softened.

As they left, he then had lie to the mother that, yes, he too was overwhelmed with sadness at her son's death. Sadness that increased with every squeeze she gave his hand.

Apparently they don't teach these skills at priest-school.
( chthonic, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 9:50, 6 replies)

I got nearly half way through that before i realised it wasn't going to be a sordid sex story.
Spoilsport.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 10:14, closed)

He had many stories
but they revolved around women in their twenties, not boys in their elevens.
( chthonic, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 10:19, closed)

Ewwww. Women?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:08, closed)

I too thought it was going the way of
Commendant Lassard in Police Academy 1, with the hooker in the podium...
(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 12:12, closed)

That gave me far too big an evil laugh.
Have a click.
( sir_spicious2000 Crap I've watched: www.filmplop.blogspot.com/, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 14:26, closed)

Winner?
(EffinNitWit asks his tobacco where his whisky is, Fri 2 Aug 2013, 16:38, closed)