singing and other noises
my mother loves to sing. actually, she used to be a singer. nowadays, however, she likes to sing utter nonsense that she's concocted around actual songs. one of her favourites is called "i know an onion, a spanish onion". not only that, but she whistles. i've got nothing against whistling normally, but when she hits a high pitch, she sounds like her mouth needs WD40. seriously, that high-pitched whine drills into your frontal lobe like a sonic weapon.
then there's the talking to inanimate objects. i've actually caught her having a conversation with a pan of sprouts before now. it really makes me worry about my future sanity.
on the other hand, she and dad have been married 40 years this may, but they still behave like lovestruck teenagers, tickling each other and giggling together on the couch. considering that most of my friends' parents are either divorced, separated or were never married, it makes a nice change.
she really topped herself the other week, though. i was in her house and complained that the entire family was going on holiday this year, but i couldn't afford it. in true mum style, she told me to stop moaning and go and make a cuppa.
so i did.
when i went back into the living room, she said "are you happy now?" "why would i be happy?" i asked her. "you're going to spain," she said.
while i was out of the room, she'd phoned the holiday company, booked and paid for a holiday for me!

she may be mental, but i love her :)
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 16:50, 8 replies)

your mum is ace
yay!
( Seventh is somewhat subdued, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 16:51, closed)

she sure is
:)
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 17:13, closed)

Mum win!

( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 16:53, closed)

woo!

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 17:13, closed)

She sounds great.
But to what tune is the onion song sung to?
( Dervel OTBC, Fri 12 Feb 2010, 15:54, closed)

i think it's called
there was a soldier
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 12 Feb 2010, 16:46, closed)