Mother Watching, with your host Flim-Flam
Lurking in the dark depths of Dorset, we come across the mother of a Flim-Flam, let us approach with care as we gaze upon this spectacle:

Distinctive calls: Can often be located by listening out for such delightful calls as ‘Oooh what smashing curtains’ and ‘Ooooh Laura Ashley, how lovely’.
Gathers: Odd buttons, pieces of string, fluff and chipsticks cunningly attached to the underside of cardigans.
Location: Can either be found curled up in the ‘craft room’ (which was originally referred to as the ‘office’ before it turned into a store room for QVC) or semi-submerged in a bath containing water hotter than the sun.
Eating habits: Usually found in the kitchen picking apart eggs for ‘the bad bits’ and boiling the living daylights out of innocent vegetables, whilst simultaneously putting saucepans back in the incorrect cupboards.
Distinguishing features: Often viewed in a colourful array of pyjamas and cardigans, on special occasions can be seen in the poshest of posh frocks clutching a Mulberry handbag and complaining of ‘hurty shoes’.
Dislikes: Smokey Nando’s restaurants that make her choke, chipped nail varnish (its for whores apparently), her youngest daughter living too far away for cuddles.
Likes: The haberdashery department in John Lewis, fellow vegetarians, gardening, watching Spaced on DVD and bamboozling everyone at Scrabble.
Listens to: System of a Down (referred to as ‘that group with the beardy plaits’), Placebo (she thinks Brian is ‘lovely’), George Benson, Westlife and occasionally her husband.

Ahhh mums.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 16 Feb 2010, 11:29, 8 replies)

I suspect your mum
may be an alien in a guise created from bad observations of old ladies. Get out whilst you can.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 16 Feb 2010, 12:16, closed)

I will take on your advice and keep an eye on her

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 16 Feb 2010, 12:54, closed)

It might just be
capgras delusion.

yes, I did have to look that up
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 16 Feb 2010, 13:36, closed)

I like the format *click*
Also what is it with mums and System of a Down? Mine always listens to it in the car- she calls it the Chop Suey band
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 16 Feb 2010, 12:23, closed)

Ta
I have no idea what the obsession is with SOAD, its a strange one though! My dad loves The Hives and Muse... they are an odd pair.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 16 Feb 2010, 12:56, closed)

the group
with the beardy plaits just made me snigger. In the library. Loudly. Whoops.
Click.
(dragondracus, Tue 16 Feb 2010, 15:39, closed)

Well my mum hates SOAD
but thinks Miley Cyrus is ace. Oh and she sometimes like Girls Aloud :/
(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Tue 16 Feb 2010, 16:17, closed)

My Mum's not into SOAD but
early Cure. She thinks Pornography is "a riot" and Faith is "soothing".

Go figure.
( venezuelan beaver cheese is mortally afraid of spoons, Thu 18 Feb 2010, 3:36, closed)