The TARDIS
I must have some form of mild OCD.
It's not necessarily collecting stuff, but just doing stuff, to almost exhaustion. I don't annoy people with it, or get obsessed with a rubik's cube for hours at a time or anything, it just means that this thing is my 'thing'. Basically I get interested in things. However this story is an example of my nature to hoard (then have huge purges, but mostly just hoard), get interested in things, not want to change things, and basically anything and everything that goes on inside my head.

The reason the story's called 'The Tardis' will come apparent later in this story of love, betrayel and revenge... sort of. Anyway, I had a locker at school, a nice red locker. I put stuff in this locker, and never took it out (I think we start to see where this is going), I must have done this for about 3 years. If I got a sheet of paper, it went in the locker, if a folder split in the locker, it stayed in the locker. Food ended up in that locker; stuff that really shouldn't even exist ended up in that locker. The locker became this wonder-structure, so intricately held together. I knew every sheet, every book that I could or could not touch without the contents of the locker spilling out alles über der platz. Eventually, just to put basic things such as folders into the locker I had to argue with it for minutes at a time. A vicious fight, yet a bout of perfect harmony; the union of man and school locker in a dance of beauty. We understood each other; we respected each other.

In short it was effectively my school collection, not an obsession with school, but seemingly an obsession with collecting stuff from my school and leaving it in my school. [Can you really blame me for wanting to leave it there?]

Anyway, the time came for some of the lockers to be emptied... they got the wrong lockers. Mine was one of the ones to go and I didn't know it. I came into school after the Summer Holidays to find my code changed, and when I managed to get the code the locker was empty. I was confused and somewhat angry. How dare they go through my locker like that, how dare they intrude upon the Frozen_Banana... my thought-map (for everyone agreed it was essentially a picture of my mind), my thought-map was gone! Well I had to go and get the stuff from my locker, in a plastic bag.
'It's there', the teacher said, pointing under a desk.
So I walked over, took the bag with my locker number and walked off.
'And the others.'
I was bewildered. The others? There's a huge black bag in my hands and he says the others? There were others, two others to be precise. A biology teacher came up to me; he seemed amazed, he had seen Doctor Who [so his words went], but he didn't know that the TARDIS was a possibility. Now he was truly happy, for he had truly seen the very laws of space-time twisted to allow three times the content of a school locker into a school locker.

Thinking about it now, it's probably why they let me do A-Level Physics. None of them were too wanky about it either.

So here concludes my story of how, through three years of on the edge insanity, I managed to drive the laws of the Universe themselves insane and create such an intricate, complex, tormented, Tetris-like creation that no University will ever accept me to do Engineering.


Also REALLY happy to see 'Reply to this thread' coming soon. Lovely to hear that our pleas are being answered.
(Frozen_Banana Shaved against the grain; thoroughly unrewarding., Thu 11 Jan 2007, 20:49, Reply)