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This is a question Neighbours

I used to live next door to a pair of elderly naturists, only finding out about their hobby when they bade me a cheerful, saggy 'Hello' while I was 25 feet up a ladder repairing the chimney. Luckily, a bush broke my fall, but the memory of a fat, naked man in an ill-fitting wig will live with me forever.

(, Thu 1 Oct 2009, 12:41)
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our former neighbour used to do my head in
We spent the best part of a year turning our back garden into a haven of tranquility, complete with a lovely comfy hammock hung between two trees. Every time I took a book and/or a cold beer and got into the hammock for a nice bit of R & R this total Geordie prick next door choice the exact same moment to play either football, table tennis or whatever else with his young son. But he couldn't do it quietly. Now I don't mind a bit of reasonable family type noise of an afternoon, but what used to really piss me off about this bloke is that all he did is shout at his kid about how "useless" "rubbish" etc, he was. It was pathetic. If anyone remembers Simon Day's "competitive dad" sketches from "The Fast Show" it was exactly like that. No sooner had I cracked open my can all I could hear was " NO, NO, NO, Dale - you've lost it again. I can do it better - watch me. Aw, look, I've beaten you again - you're bloody useless man". This went on for hours. Don't know why the kid even bothered leaving his room to be honest.
It was as much as I could do some days to stop myself poking my head over the wall and saying "give him a break you wanker". Wish I had.
(, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 13:39, 2 replies)
Dale will have the last laugh
when he chooses Dad's retirement home.
Trust me, it'll be the most wee-smelling, drunken-staffed, bucket-chaired hellhole he can find.
(, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 13:43, closed)
I'd like to think so! Poor kid just looked completely beaten every time I saw him.
(, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 14:21, closed)

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