Night of the living dead.
Drum & Bass. Acid. Sleep Deprivation: a bad combination you might think, and you'd be right, it's a dreadful combination.

I discovered just how awful these things are together when, already dazed by the kind of sleep deprivation a piece of coursework can inflict on a serial procrastinator, I foolishly accepted an invitation to accompany a college friend on a trip to his local, back street, deeply underground drum and bass club. In Derby.

Apparently a friend of his was to "drop some phat choons" or however you kids describe Disc Jockeying nowadays, and I would be granted entry upon the ever-so-exclusive guest list (it quickly transpired that this exclusivity extended to about 95% of the occupants of the club, but apparently is isn't cool to suggest we might join the other, shorter queue in the interest of gaining far swifter entry).

I coughed into the club and was immediately overwhelmed by the wall of smoke that appeared to permeate from the very walls of the place. It seemed there wasn't a drug in existence that wasn't being consumed in vast quantities, but crack was certainly a distinct favourite among the party goers inside.

A tiny piece of crudely torn paper was pressed into one hand and a bottle of beer into the other. It had been a few years since I'd danced with Lucy in the sky and I eagerly slipped the tab onto my tongue and took a seat while I waited for acid's soft hands to start massaging my mind.

"Wake up, you cunt." I think it was a bouncer and I think it was barking at me, but I couldn't be sure. The acid had taken hold in my sleep and a grizzly bear seemed to be doing an angry jig in front of me.

Distorted bass permeated my core, shaking my innards to pieces while gunshot snares pierced holes in my face with alarming rapidity. I glanced around and zombies with deep, sunset red eyes nodded at reggae pace while the undulating beats sent one drunken reveller into a fury of limb swinging delirium.

"Mih.key Finn, Mih.Key.Somethingorother.Finn" was shouted repeatedly by the emmcee and a unified roar arose from the crowded dance floor below. I had no idea where my friend had gone, or how long I'd slumbered on the sofa for, but it appeared not to matter to the gigantic zombie sat next to me, who was waiving a monstrous spliff in my face with the unlikely reassurance that "it's nah crack, ya know". I was too intimidated not to take it and puffed greedily on it before passing it along the line and slumping into a deeply stoned haze.

More sleep was soon interrupted when my sneering, wild eyed friend pushed more beer into my hand and garbled incoherently into my face. The fiend was trying to destroy my frontal lobe then throw me to the zombies below. It was clear he'd become one of them himself, but I calmly accepted the drink and pulled heavily on the reefer he offered before politely refusing the chance to go willingly into the carnage myself.

"I'll fight you all to the end" I spat at him and he grinned widely and said "yeah, it's fucking ace, aint it" before bouncing back down the stairs and into the mass of undead.

The rest of the night appeared to pass in phases as bouts of sleep were interrupted by beers and joints, and each familiar tune seemed to account for several hours at a go. The last tune was started for the 20th time before the crowd tired of requesting yet another rewind and the DJ let it go for a few hours before abruptly killing the power to his turntable. The beat came to a stumbling halt and an eerily zombified voice concluded a drawn out "bass tooooo daaaaaaaaarrrrrrrk" as the final dribbles of acid trickled out of my veins.

As I sauntered out into the late morning sunshine with the flesh seeking mob, and strolled down the road, arms dangling limply at my sides and a slack-jawed vacancy spread across my face it became all too apparent that I, too, had joined the ranks of the undead.
( Moey, Wed 8 Apr 2009, 17:19, 4 replies)

that was brilliant
*click*
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 8 Apr 2009, 17:24, closed)

Very nice
great post, mate!
( SpankyHanky, Wed 8 Apr 2009, 17:30, closed)

Lovely,
just lovely. Well written. Brings back some similar flesh melting memories for me. Must post about later...
(cheez is feeling ergophobic, Wed 8 Apr 2009, 17:31, closed)

Fantastic
That was beautifully written and made me smile. Cheers
(Rotimer was micturating windward at, Thu 9 Apr 2009, 11:31, closed)