The Ballad of Nails Jim
Jim was at the opposite side of a circle of friends to myself, so I didn't know him well.

But he had a reputation as a bit of a hard man.

So much so that his nickname was (hard as) Nails Jim.

I'd heard of his exploits, but never been witness to them myself.

Until one fateful night in The Hacienda in about '93.

For once, we weren't getting up to much in the way of mischief, just a few chilled out beers and a bit of dancing.

In a crowded Hacienda, we even had the good fortune to procure a nice, hidden away seating alcove. It didn't really occur to us that it was odd that this area was available when everywhere else was packed.

I was seated away from Nails Jim, and as this was only the second or third time I had met him I didn't know much about him. Turns out he was a poncy media studies student, not what I expected given his reputation.

I was soon to be disabused of any future notions that media studies students are in anyway poncey though.

Shadows fell across our table, we looked up and four hulking great black guys were looming over us telling us in no uncertain terms to move.

I grabbed my beer and went to stand up, I wasn't about to argue.

Jim said 'No'

I gulped, hoping I had misheard.

Although i doubt I looked as shocked as the guy who clearly wasn't used to people not obeying him.

'What did you say?'

'I said no'

Now, this is probably just paranoia on my part, but one of the gang reached behind their back.

My mind said 'Gun'

My mouth said 'gu...gu...'

And the guy stepped forward, to be met square in the mouth by Jim's forehead.

A backwards step and a gap opened, I dived for it, two other friends dived for it.

And we were gone with barely a glance back, just in time to see Jim pushing another of the gang against a wall, say something that to this day I have no idea what it was and then walk calmly over to us and say 'Come on lads, I guess we better leave'

And that, my friends, was the night that Nails jim headbutted one of the leaders of Moss sides 'Gooch Gang'

It was also one of the last times I saw Nails Jim until a few years later when I saw him on the ITV news.

Marrying Kate Winslett.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 14 Apr 2009, 16:46, 1 reply)

REALLY!!
Wow thats an awesome story!!
(lankynyack, Wed 15 Apr 2009, 0:27, closed)