Carry on Nurse
It was a 'bad taste' fancy dress party at the rowing club. I'd gone wearing a short hospital gown with big hairy bollocks (made from a sack) dangling below the hem. My girlfriend was dressed as a tampon. One of my mates was there in his caver's furry suit, regretting it due to the heat. The-most-beautiful-girl-in-the-club was dressed as a corpse, in a fetching floaty dress/shroud thing.

It started off well, and there was plenty of booze. But somehow furry caver man got into an argument with a bloke dressed as a creepy vicar over the-most-beautiful-girl-in-the-club. There was a drunken fight and furry bloke fell, banged his head and there was blood everywhere. He sat up and was promptly very sick.

It's amazing how quickly you sober up in those situations, and I, as the most suddenly-sober, found a really-sober person with a car to go to A&E with furry bloke. My girlfriend came along to keep me company.

So I sat in A&E for hours between a stinking, bleeding furry bloke and a girl dressed as a tampon, with my huge hairy bollocks hanging out. Every now and then a nurse would come over and try to take me back to the ward and I'd have to convince her that I wasn't actually a patient. We got a taxi back home, although 2 taxis drove away when they saw us. I'm not sure what life-lesson I learned from this, but I have never found myself in this situation again.
(Smale is stuffed, Thu 24 Mar 2011, 18:07, 1 reply)

Bad taste
When I was at Uni, my college hosted a 'bad taste' formal dinner. All the usual suspects were there: 70s kipper ties, girls dressed as prostitutes, etc etc. One guy sat for the whole meal in an orange anorak with the hood up. It wasn't the nicest anorak, but it hardly constituted what you'd generally call bad taste.

I asked him to tell me more about the anorak. 'No, no,' he says, 'I'm Jamie Bulger.'
( daikoku has been on a ragga tip since, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 19:15, closed)