Hmm
I was playing darts in a doubles match in my local, and I was having a mare. There was about 30 people watching and I just couldn't hit a cow's arse with a banjo; but my partner leaves me 80 to win the match and go into the county finals.

I stride confidently to the oche and throw; 20, treble 12. My favourite double 12, and it come "off the wire" as the Almighty Sid Wadell would say.

Still now, I have no idea why I did it; but as the dart headed to the floor I volley it.

It goes through my trainer, and lodges neatly into the space between the knuckle of the big toe and foot. I bloody scream, fall down and smack my head on the edge of the pool table.

I wake up about 10 mins later, lying on the floor, blood over my shirt and a dart in my foot. Lee my darts partner was doubled up with laughter as was most of the pub.
(Strump striving for imperfection since, Sun 30 Jan 2011, 18:43, 4 replies)

and nobody saw you?
quite an achievement that...
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sun 30 Jan 2011, 19:02, closed)

'I'm glad nobody saw me'
bit of a clue in the title, there
( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Sun 30 Jan 2011, 19:18, closed)

you're 16 minutes less mean than me, you are.
tee hee.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sun 30 Jan 2011, 20:53, closed)

Bollocks 10 minutes.
That's brain damage time, and someone from the throngs of spectators would have attempted to help you. I call shenanigans.
(mysterious_w, Sun 30 Jan 2011, 23:47, closed)