I Feel Like.....
Cassandra. Tells the truth but doomed for people not to believe me...For the record, all of my tales are essentially true but may be a wee bit exaggerated for comedic effect. Except the ones that are obvious jokes.

And Denty? My drinking, fighting pulling partner of yesteryear? He's the head of the maths department at a public school. Not seen him in donkeys...

OBTale

As a techy I've had to deal with the problems that have since become Urban Legends. The woman who photocopied her floppy disks when asked to make a copy. A guy who managed to jam *3* 5 1/4 inch floppies into his drive at the same time, the exec who was trying to fax a document by holding it to the screen and hitting the fax button in Word. Yup - I've had those and many, many more. The next tale happened at my last place of work.

I was working on 2nd/3rd line in a service desk and every once in a while the firstliners would put a call through to me that they couldn't deal with or if they didn't know which team it was supposed to go to. So one day a call was put through to me from the Headmistress of a local school.

"Hi - you're speaking to legless, what seems to be the problem" I said

"It's the children’s computers" this incredibly posh voice bleated "They're riddled with pornography and it keeps popping up all over the screen"

"OK - exactly what kind of pornography?" I asked

"COCKS!!! BIG BLACK COCKS!!!" screamed the head excitedly.

I corpsed. Hit the mute button and wet myself...

BTW - might have told this one before. Your memory starts to go when you reach my age.....

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Fri 22 Sep 2006, 16:31, Reply)